Kindness

I have been thinking a lot about tension, conflict and kindness. I am in a new-ish, Jewish job and am working with an executive coach, after realizing that with a bigger job, I must call upon different skills to be successful. I am scaling up my game, so to speak, and so talk to my coach for an hour once a week.

This week we talked a lot about kindness in the face of conflict. In my job, I get yelled at a lot by external parties. They come to me to vent, to be heard, to feel like their grievances have been registered.  When I was younger, less experienced, I might have yelled back, been defensive or shook with rage after one of these experiences. Now I listen, and offer fresh starts, kindness, admit guilt where there may be none. Being right is less important than being kind.

What it leaves me feeling, however, is tired. I need to replenish the stores of kindness from time to time and my boys help. As does the knowledge that just around the corner is someone who will be kind to me; I surround myself with evidence that laughter is curative and a smile takes less energy than a frown.

And I am lucky in so many ways, as I have love in my life, unconditionally, and that is a self-replenishing resource.

So go ahead, yell at me. It will make you feel better.